Ah, birthdays. I am now 62. Sixty fucking two. I should not be alone at this point in my life. But here I am, solo, solitary, just me.
Desi and I went for massages on Friday evening, 90 minute instead of 60. The lavender sugar foot scrub was included as a gift. Nice. I finally got someone who would massage my scalp, ahhhh. Saturday evening, Desi made a birthday dinner for me and Adam/Eve, a scrumptious white chicken chili. We dropped by Ocean Mart and I got a couple of those super soft floofy buns for my treat. Desi gave me a bag of Earl Grey Lavender Milk tea packets as my gift. So nice for winter. Still, both mornings were pretty awful. I couldn't help thinking about all our winter trips for my birthday. Hawaii, and last year we were in San Francisco. Damn. I loved traveling with Larry, we'd cuddle up on the plane, he'd make sure he carried my bags, and all the wonderful things we did together. I am fortunate we had that time together, but I am crushed we will be missing out on so many years going forward.
Sunday was Fire Tribe, Jason PinkHair drove me down. Good to see everyone, but there's still a bit of weird awkwardness going on. I will address the tribe next time, smooth things out. This morning I got two beach bags of Larry's t-shirts ready to go, so everyone who wants one can take one. Tribe shirts, Burning Man shirts, Elememt 11 shirts, weird shirts, interesting shirts, tourist shirts. Better then sending them off to the thrift shop. I saved out the orange fire tribe shirt to take to the E-11 temple.
Monday was a terrible snow day. I also had a Very Bad Day. Far too much crying. Missing him is painful, hard work. Just horrible. All I can do is hold on and ride it through.
I finally got all the Christmas things put away, including the bins in the truncated downstairs hall, and the tree out in the shed. I even got it up into the loft. I took the two bins with the autumn silk flowers out to the shed too, they're very lightweight. Also adulted with a couple financial phone calls.
Someone took my trash cans to the curb. The garbageman was putting the recycle bin back together, I guess one of the wheels fell off. He gave me a card to call about the big green waste can, its handle is broken and it really is falling apart. We'll see if I get a new one or not.
There is not a single day which goes by without tears at some point. Argh.
Desi and I went for massages on Friday evening, 90 minute instead of 60. The lavender sugar foot scrub was included as a gift. Nice. I finally got someone who would massage my scalp, ahhhh. Saturday evening, Desi made a birthday dinner for me and Adam/Eve, a scrumptious white chicken chili. We dropped by Ocean Mart and I got a couple of those super soft floofy buns for my treat. Desi gave me a bag of Earl Grey Lavender Milk tea packets as my gift. So nice for winter. Still, both mornings were pretty awful. I couldn't help thinking about all our winter trips for my birthday. Hawaii, and last year we were in San Francisco. Damn. I loved traveling with Larry, we'd cuddle up on the plane, he'd make sure he carried my bags, and all the wonderful things we did together. I am fortunate we had that time together, but I am crushed we will be missing out on so many years going forward.
Sunday was Fire Tribe, Jason PinkHair drove me down. Good to see everyone, but there's still a bit of weird awkwardness going on. I will address the tribe next time, smooth things out. This morning I got two beach bags of Larry's t-shirts ready to go, so everyone who wants one can take one. Tribe shirts, Burning Man shirts, Elememt 11 shirts, weird shirts, interesting shirts, tourist shirts. Better then sending them off to the thrift shop. I saved out the orange fire tribe shirt to take to the E-11 temple.
Monday was a terrible snow day. I also had a Very Bad Day. Far too much crying. Missing him is painful, hard work. Just horrible. All I can do is hold on and ride it through.
I finally got all the Christmas things put away, including the bins in the truncated downstairs hall, and the tree out in the shed. I even got it up into the loft. I took the two bins with the autumn silk flowers out to the shed too, they're very lightweight. Also adulted with a couple financial phone calls.
Someone took my trash cans to the curb. The garbageman was putting the recycle bin back together, I guess one of the wheels fell off. He gave me a card to call about the big green waste can, its handle is broken and it really is falling apart. We'll see if I get a new one or not.
There is not a single day which goes by without tears at some point. Argh.
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