Monday, November 26, 2018

Have a Relatively Pleasant Continued Existence.

I began the day in tears.  Sleep had come and gone, dreams were strange.  The insurance on the truck is an iffy thing as I do not have a license, and the driver is not a resident of this household.  Larry's name is not off all accounts and I dread correspondence addressed to him.  I messaged a friend, and saw the last  conversation we had about prepping for Burning Man, Larry's neck pain and potential pneumonia.  That was mere days before I took him to the ER and they discovered the mass.  I went downstairs to get the Spode Christmas tree cookie jar and teapots, and discovered two printers which I thought had gone to the dumpster.  A box of Christmas glasses and mugs which Larry was going to make into candles.  The leaves outside always break my heart.  So many little paper cuts on my heart.

A dear friend lost her beloved cat in some sort of freak accident.  Devastating.  He was a lovely creature, loving and universally loved.  My heart aches for her.

But I got the norens up, and the garlands with them, and a few more bows.  Did the kitty litter and a red table cloth in the front room. Ate a hot lunch of chicken and a baked yam, yes, with my excellent cranberry sauce.  Received a lovely little Moon pendant as part of a gift exchange, a holiday card, and a commission for a leather tool roll.  Had a nice long phone conversation with another local widow who is only six weeks out.  I am calmer, if not happier.

Ordered an external hard drive.  Excellent deal, but I really shouldn't be buying things.  Ah well.

Three in the afternoon, I gave in to the call of a hot bath, and having a nice cuppa in my flannel nightgown.  Everything can wait.

How does one end a conversation with someone bereaved?  Have a nice day doesn't cut it.  I think I said "Have a relatively pleasant continued existence".  Hah.  I cannot even quote myself.


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