Migration

I am going to try Wordpress.  I do not have a good feeling about this, but no one reads blogspot.

https://maggiemayhem.home.blog/

Winter is really, really here.

There's a foot or more of snow.  Lots of downed branches in the road, including one which blocked Quincy Ave. I only see one in the yard, one the garage roof, pretty small, and missed the wires.

Went to see Frozen II with the nieces, then on to a buffet.  Not a bad day at all, although I did come home and sleep. 

Of course the windshield blanket came in after the heavy snowfall.  So much fun.

Winter is here.

Matt showed up Sunday morning, swept the leaves off the garage and cleared the gutters just in time.  I sent him home with the mini bottles in the bog glass vase and a bag of booze I will never drink.  Stuff like the one open bourbon, a bottle of gin, some coco-rum, and one of Larry;s Apple Pie liqueurs.  The bag of candy canes is out of the pantry now, destined for Santa Rampage.  Snow yesterday, and snow impending for the holiday.  I pushed some of it around, but the driveway is iced over where I did not bother.  I really, really should have done it while the truck is at Desi's.

Saw Maleficent yesterday.  Not bad, but I would have liked it better if I didn't need to pee through most of it.  A couple came in last minute, sat a couple seats over.  Really people, grab a row up, I didn't need to hear your chatter and candy wrapper rustling.  You'd have had a better view in the middle instead of on the end.  Weirdos.I wouldn't be complaining of I hadn;t been the only other person in the theater...

I picked up my glasses, and dropped off a pair of Larry's sunglasses for donation.  I think there's one last pair left in the house.  Feels quite final. 

Korey of Mr. Maid came and cleaned the dryer vent.  It needs to be replaced, but it okay for now.  Turns out it is NOT attached at the top.  Yikes. He was very nice, and even cleaned the dryer face for me.

Tiny chores today.  Washed the blankets and top sheet because Lolo peed on me yet again.  Took the recycle bin out and back again.  Cleaned up the countertop next to the dryer a bit.  Turned up the fireplace to keep the basement warm.  Turned on the diffuser in the front room.  Cooked fried rice with chicken and veggies.  Filled the coffee canister.  Did dishes. Found a little basket for my gloves to sit by the back entry.  Hung a picture. Dusted my bedside vanity, found a tiny chair for Loki so he isn't falling off the perfume bottles.  Lost my ruby touchstone. Brought up the clean towels, took down all the dirty laundry.  Looked up a gift for Desi. Ordered a snow cover for the truck windshield.  Got the ice melt out of the shed, put the gutter piece where it will prevent ice out front.  Swept and move leaves from in front of the garage.  

Autumn blues

I went for my CTScan yesterday.  Clear liquid fasting and pre-medication beforehand, how much fun is that?  No, I did not need to be early to drink the potion of ugh, it was just the IV contrast.  Even with the Prednisone and the benadryl, I still popped a hive on my hip.  Means they kept me for an extra 30 minutes to make sure I didn't have a more severe reaction.  Means they will be extra cautious next time.  I did get to eat lunch at the cafe, salmon and a nice cauliflower mix, with a yummy bread roll.  Had a terrible headache, came home and slept.

This morning I made cherry-cranberry sauce, two pint jars.  I will freeze one.  A little too runny, but good flavor, nice and tart.  I have two more bags of cranberries, so I am looking at cranberry loaf recipes.  The Instacart guy brought the sucky orange juice with calcium, so I need to cook with it as much as possible.  Extra calcium makes my joints ache, and tastes like crap. I need to make sure I put a note in for NO No no calcium.  I got maple bars, and now I feel sugar loaded.  Probably why I am in no mood for chores.

Getting some laundry done and minor tidying.  The step ladder came in, and while it is cold out, it is sunny.  I keep stepping out and looking at the front flower bed, the patio gutters,  and what I need to do weed-wise, but I simply cannot get moving outside.  While I was in the laundry room, I looked up and saw I had not gotten down my pumpkin tea set or my gourd pitcher and squirrel.  When I do the autumn flowers, those usually go on the baker's rack.  I just spaced out on them.  It doesn't really matter, but it makes me sad.  I am getting the dryer vent cleaned out, and need to have the tub drain snaked, so I am probably going to skip roof lights this year too.

I got my indulgent Loki opera scarf and Loungefly purse.  So marvelous.  I should wrap them up for Christmas, they are definitely gift quality.  Nice, nice, nice.  The scarf is smooth as Loki's silver-tongued voice, as silky as one might imagine his touch to be.  There, done fan-girling for the year.  I  realize what I spent on these things would have paid for roof light installation, but while I love my lights, I also love pretty things.  It is a trade off, and one I am okay with this time around. 

Now, about those leaves on the roof ... gah.

Comeon, kid....

My will to get on the garage roof to sweep is fading fast.  I thought I could use the tree ladder, but it is too heavy for me to move at all.  I guess I can use the telescoping ladder in the shed, but I am unconvinced.  It is a tricky beast.  Yesterday I worked on the front flowerbed, got it about half done, and I was wiped out.  I was too shaky for the roof.  Today?  I don't know what is wrong.  Sleep was uneven, in two shifts with music and tea in the middle of the night.  I woke up at six, fed the cats, had coffee, went next door and fed Rowena's cats.  Got dressed when Juan showed up to do the yard.  Been online looking at money and bills and am just dragged down by it all.  Got a few things paid, looked up and checked in on other financial things.  Ordered a tall step ladder which means I can do stuff in the backyard without the tall ladder, like clean the patio gutters.  Got an appointment to clean the dryer vent.

The truck is away being detailed.  That bumper crunch looks like it did bend the metal. I do not want to deal with it.

Ogden Uncon is cancelled and refunds are being offered, but I cannot find my email saying I bought an advanced ticket for $50.  No email.  I may be out.

Sent in a refund request to my CC for that stupid fold up scootery thingy.  I may be out money for that. Dammit.

Did get my cube refund, good.

Got my felted leaves so I can do my arm warmers.  Nice.

Made a payment on one of my outstanding debts.  I get airline miles, and I will use them.  San Diego in February.

Orrin got my new LED fixture installed.  Holy crap, the basement is a mess now that I can see it.  More to deal with. 

Maybe I am ready for Hawaii.

Well, that's not exciting.

Turns out I have cataracts.  I knew I was not seeing as well, but I correct to 20/20, so it was nebulous.  Huh.  Now that I know, I can "see" the big one.  In dim light, if there is an indicator light, or the projected time on my ceiling. I can move the cataract in front of it, and the light vanishes.  Weird.  I will have surgery in January.  Surgeries.  The bad news is I just got glasses at America's Best, haven't even picked them up yet, and I will not need them in the long run.  I can have tinted lens put in though, I will still need sun glasses. 

Other good news is the dermatologist says none of my moles and assorted barnacles are worrisome.  I should go in annually for a look-see though. 

On Thursday I have the mammogram, on Friday, the CT scan.  Joy.

Today I will try to sweep the garage roof.  Joy joy.

Loopedy loops

I was doing well, then did a crash and burn.  It happens. All my rosy plans for Getting Shit Done circled the drain and crapped out this weekend. At least this week with be sunny and mild, which gives me a chance at finishing the downspouts and doing a bit of winterizing.  The garage roof has a thick blanket of leaves already, that cannot stand.

Yesterday I had my front teeth done.  Holy crap, the initial numbing shots are painful.  Incredibly so. I sprang for laughing gas.  Nice.  And now my teeth look nice.  They did before, but there was some behind the scenes deterioration.

Desi took me to free lunch day at Texas Roadhouse.  A little six inch sirloin, the very yummy rolls, and a glorious baked sweet potato.  I even got mushrooms on my steak.  A pleasant outing.  My mouth was sore and I was exhausted, so I took a long afternoon nap after  a hot bath.  Spent time teaching Alexa more of my favorite music.

I have very nearly finished repairing Rowena's painting which had two puncture wounds,  By no means a professional job, but good enough for a suburban living room.  I can see the imperfections, but will try to not point them all out to her.

I have today off, but I also have Wednesday and Friday appointments.  Lyft is loving me this month.

Edit: what I posted on r/widowers:

Shortly after my husband passed, I made a list, a paper pep talk, a note to self, and posted it in my kitchen. Questions to myself about who I was now, things to strive for, ways forward, reminders. I'm not even sure how to describe it. I just went and looked at it today, as I often do; I am about 14 months out now. I took it down and wrote a new one. Year Two. It is not much different, but I can see what I have let go, what I want, and a reminder that if I want something done, I have to do it myself, or find paid professionals. I can only rely on one friend consistently, she is a true hero, but she is only one human with many demands on her time. That she can carve out hours a week for me is spectacular. So many of us do not have dedicated people who truly show the ways they care in concrete actions. So if I want a chore done, I can't just wait until he comes home to do it like I used to be able to do. I think procrastinating was and is a way to pretend he's just out on the road, that this is just a deployment with an indeterminate extension. No, my heart, he's gone. It hurts, but it is true and inescapable.

So the new list is up, the old one crumpled into a ball. I think I am improving. I have more of these positive moments of clarity. I do more. Oh, I still cry every day, and mope, and have the sads, but I do have better upward trends. Here's to progress in this moment. Hey, I vacuumed, put away the summer sheets, put away the Halloween pumpkins out front, and very nearly have my neighbor's painting repaired. I'm mostly impressed I vacuumed. It hurts my back, and was not my chore. My floors get crunchy. Not today! I guess I am entering the Suck It Up, Buttercup phase. Better than the Soggy Swamp of Tears, which I know I will revisit, but for now, I think I have a foot on solid ground under the quicksand. Fingers crossed.

More than the leaves are turning. One hopes.

I feel as if I am turning some kind of corner.  Oh, I am still sad and procrastinating, I miss Larry intensely all the time, and life still feels as if I have lost my compass, identity and the point of it all.  Perhaps I am a touch less sad, a little more resigned to reality.  Maybe.  I still play solitaire and binge watch shows for hours on end.  But I swept the floor and worked on Rowena's painting, and dug out the stuff to fix up the crappy arm warmers I got in the mail.  Dribs and driba, but a few more each week.

Today I went into the basement to fetch my flashlight, and the container of tiny porcelain animals for a project.  I got the dryer going, took out the big trash, put the trash bags where I could find them easier, moved some stuff around.  I tossed the dozen or so bags of flavored masrshmallows Larry had bought to make his rice crispy treats.  They were end of year stock in 2017 anyway.  Pumpkin spice, gingerbread, vanilla.  I'd gotten rid of the cereal early, it doesn't keep.  I won't make the treats for myself, and if I make fudge, those were too stale.  I use the jar stuff.  I do have a couple jars on hand, and butter in the freezer.  Now that the weather has cooled, I can make fudge.  It is not a summer thing at all. 

The whole point is I was able to toss the marshmallows without feeling overly wasteful or guilty.  A bit, and I feel weepy, but am not actually crying. Maybe.

Good morning, Ogden!

Let's Make a Deal isn't even over and I have already finished one big chore: calling the VA.  I hate calling the VA, but if I do, it saves me a couple thousand each year in property taxes. 

I looked up a coffee cake recipe, after all, I do have an unopened box of Bisquick.  I found another frozen jar of chili bean stewp,so that is thawing.  I add other beans and veggies to it in the small slow cooker, that makes something like four or five meals.  There's a ground turkey chub thawing too, but I might just fry it up and put it over rice. The rice is sitting on the counter now, I need to use it up, so I put it in a very inconvenient place.   I am motivated to make meals from what I have in the pantry and freezer! 

I have my commissary list done, concentrating on the foods I need for the whole lower my cholesterol gig.  Lots of tuna, nuts, and oatmeal.  Applesauce.  Frozen veggies.  Guac.  I cannot digest fresh leafy greens, and buying salad fixings and fresh veggies for one picky eater means a lot of waste later.  I can skip the mac salad for a while, and go with darker (and less) chocolate.  Less ice cream too.  Meh, it's winter.

All my appointments came in, five total in November before Thanksgiving!  Teeth, eyes, dermatology, mammo, and a CT scan.  Whoa.  Busy, busy.  And LMAD is still on!

Now if I could only recall what I originally got online for, before I began looking up coffee cake recipes.

And even more ...

Ah, cavities and wear, I have a filling appointment, a referral to an eye doc and a dermatologist, my mammo scheduled, and waiting for a call from radiology about the CT approval.  I might not be keen about self-care as much as I should be here at home, but I will certainly get the professionals on board!

Seeing Dr. Carabine was as unfortunate as I feared.  I came home and binge watched shows on Netflix and Amazon.  Hungry, as usual.  I did go chat with the neighbor.  She's having the wall between the kitchen and living room removed, it will look great.  I have no idea how they afford all this, they're older than I am, he's still working but she is retired, and she's always worried about money.  I guess being happy in your home is important.  I guess if I wanted work done, I could do a home equity loan, and let the future take care of itself once I pass on.  Ha.  Nah, I'm going to let this place tumble down around my ears and someone can do an amazing flip later.

Next task is to get the eating back on track.  Cold weather means I am hungry all the time, and the time change doesn't help.  Better choices for the cholesterol is a must.  More tuna and oatmeal, I am doing well enough with nuts; I need a nut cup, otherwise I tend to graze.  More chicken and turkey and good fish in the freezer for sure; I am going through the old pork loins slowly.  Winter means chili though, that will help.  Legumes are good.  More veggies, frozen will be my friend.  Cooking solo veggies is difficult otherwise.  I still have sooo many green beans in cans, last of Larry's stock up.  They make me sad, they were out favorite side when throwing dinner together.  Sad beans it is.

Got poor old Harry a boarding reservation for December.  Poor old guy.

Big money day today.  Caught up on the debit balance, paid a CC, paid property tax (what little I do pay), paid down on a loan, paid a couple maintenance fees.  Gah.  I spend too much.  Now I need to question whether I want roof lights up for Christmas or not, that's not exactly cheap.  Cheapish though, and it makes me happy.

Appointments and more appointments

So many places to be.  Eyes, teeth, my pre-annual and my annual.  A well woman exam is on the schedule.  Labs and blood drawn, of course.  No surprise my AC1 is 6, and my cholesterol is high.  Doc is talking anti-depressants, which agitates and energizes me.  Teeth need a filling in the front.  Got the same glasses, just a different prescription, but not much.  The Ray-Bans I like are the last frame in stock, so I got a nice discount. 

Massage appointment too, I really am glad I get to go back to Lindsey instead of Hannah.  Hannah is nice, she's competent, but she does not hit the right note for me.  There's weirdness on the left side of my neck, pain and odd knots.I guess I need to tell the doc about that too.

I have an appointment to see Dr. Carabine about the hernia.  I know I will cry, he doesn't know Larry has died.  Last time he saw Larry was my surgery last year.  I get stressed when I have to tell someone new.

I got my mammogram letter.  Joy.  Another appointment to make.

I found a therapist online who looks promising, takes Tricare, and is within walking distance.  A possibility if I can get a referral and if he is taking patients.

Must make reservations for Harry to be boarded when I go to Maui.

Getting a quote on putting up the Christmas lights.

I need a haircut.

Why am I so very hungry?

What deams...

This morning I fasted as I had to have annual blood work labs done.  No coffee meant I had a remarkable headache.  After, I went across the street to Virg's, had a French Toast Monte Cristo, or most of one.  Their portions are huge.  Very, very chilly in the biting wind, down in the 30s.  Even my parka didn't feel warm, I needed a scarf.  Between the full tummy and the cold, I was sleepy as heck.

I got home and changed, and went back to bed.  Ferocious headache.  I slept on and off until almost noon, which is out of character for me.  During my last hard sleep stretch, I dreamt I was having a meal with Larry.  He was laughing and we were quiet happy.  He went to sign the check, and I took it instead, saying it would not go through, that I had deleted him from everything "that time when you were dead".  He seemed quite surprised, and I thought about how difficult it would be to add him back on all the accounts. 

Then I woke up.  It was nice while it lasted ...

Winter is coming

Two beautiful weekend days, two days to hustle to get the stuff done which must be done.  Wrap the roses, put away the hoses, insulate the faucets, get both rain barrels covered and in the garage, attach the winter down spouts, put away the spinner sprinkler, get the aloe vera somewhere warmer.  Sasquatch and the Buddha need coats and hats, or to go into the shed.  .I know I should trim the raspberries, sweep some of the leaves, but we shall see. I am physically tired.

I am trying to repair a print on canvas for Rowena.  It has a hole and a scrape.  I've done similar things to blank canvas and to paintings, this piece in quite nice.  She thinks it is a painting, but it is a textured repro.  I will not tell her.  Going well so far.

I made yogurt.  Turned my back on the milk for a moment, and it boiled. That doesn't matter much, but will make it grainy.

After doing so well for so long, Lolo peed on the bed again.  I think the fuzzy throws are just irresistible to her.  Ah well, that meant I got the flannel sheets down and washed the cotton set.  Now I can put away the summer sheets, and my summer nightgowns.  I needed to change the sheets anyway, it had been a grotesquely long time since I had. 

I got my autumn order of Lake Champlain chocolates in.  That's not a lot of goodies for the price, but it is a once a year treat.  Vermont truffles (5), cider caramels (7), and a small bag of vermont maple caramel leaves. Very wonderful. I eat one piece daily.  I also have way too much Halloween candy, and this year will be frigid.  Not as much handing out when it is cold, so I will need to freeze some, or give it away.  I got some teal allergen free candy too, and some toys.  At least the toys will keep.

Turn turn turn

I got my bottles of Boiled Cider today.  So good.  Essentially consists of Vermont cider which has been reduced into a tart yet sweet syrupy reduction.  Use it like syrup on pancakes or yogurt, or bake with it, or put it in tea or ginger tea, or sip little sips.  Autumn in a bottle, simply fabulous.  I had a little on goat cheese on a slice of orange-cranberry bread.  Mmmm.

Weird day.  I thought I had a doctor's appointment, but the online system had not sent a confirmation.  Doc was doing urgent care, and it was early, so I got in to get my water pill refill.  We talked, I got a referral for my hernia, and he wants to talk about something to elevate my mood and alleviate what might be depression instead of simple grief.  Hmmm.  Maybe I can talk him into a therapist instead.  I have not done well with mood altering drugs in the past, I am not eager to try.  We shall talk.

I came home and changed clothes into my nightgown.  Ten in the morning, and I was dressed for bed.  I dinked around some, did a load of laundry, tidied this and that, but the depression discussion swamped me quite unexpectedly. I cannot even identify the resulting emotions accurately, despair? Fear? Annoyance? Denial?  I was fine treading water.  I think.  I do not care for self-doubt. So I played games and watched some TV, wasted time online, and played with the cats.  Signed up for Secret Santa.  Took pictures of Loki. Put off bringing in the back mat, or putting away the rain barrels.

I have an eye appointment tomorrow.  It will be more expensive, but far less traumatic.

Dinnertime

I made a meal.  I thawed the pork loins, and baked them in the aluminum roaster with tasty spices.  I heated up rice, and peas.  A nice hot meal, with enough leftover for two more.  Once they cool in the fridge, I will decide if I shall have them this week, or portion them up and vac-seal them for later.  There didn't used to be leftovers.

The spices were a mix we got on Kauai a few years back, from the vanilla farm, a variant of garam masala,  I put a little low sodium Worcestershire in the bottom and the lightest glaze of the lilikoi syrup I got at the farmer's market in Hawi this last trip.  The rice was a Tasty Bites packet of brown rice we'd bought for Burning Man last year.  The peas were Le Seur, some of the last from the big stock up, also from last year.  With the exception of the lilikoi syrup, all of this food was in the house before, before, before.

As I plated up my food, I looked out the kitchen window, knowing I would have been calling Larry in from his chores to eat his supper while it was hot.  He'd bustle in and stomp around, washing his hands and grumbling I had interrupted his flow.  He'd be patting me on the bum and giving me awkward hugs while I worked, and I'd swat him.  Then he would carry the tray with the plates for me into wherever we were eating.  His gray cotton jacket he would have been wearing still hangs on the hook by the back door.  His work gloves went up in smoke in the desert. There is nothing here now but me and this pantry food, the and the ghost meat from the freezer.

I didn't cry much, but I screamed at the universe for a minute, begging for him to come back, to share a meal, gripe at me, all while giving me a grab and a hug.

This is why I avoid cooking.  Fuck.

Moving forward

Desi came over to take me shopping, we got the majority of the Halloween decorations put up out front.  I like my streamers, and the cats love to watch them.

I got one of the rainbarrels unhooked and rinsed out before the storm came in.  I just need to get it in the garage and covered up.  The big barrel is next.  I have the hose faucet open, so it should be draining.  The hoses will be next, before the freezing weather sets in. 

Logan came and got the hitch rack.  That helps with re-arranging the lean-to behind the garage. He also took the leather for Six.  We have not decided whether Six will pay me, make something for me, or if this is just a gift from Larry, but that's okay.  This is the leather which is very stiff and heavy, not something I can work with.  I kept the softer hides and sides, and all the tools.  I also have everything staged in the kitchen to go down into the basement, where I have a place for it other than in front of Larry;s closet in the bedroom. This is a true leap forward for me. 

Logan also took two pieces of cast iron.  One is a new griddle pan, for cooking bacon and steaks, brand new and never used.  He also took the big skillet.  This is the one Larry found in the dumpster in San Diego, along with a couple other pans and the leather strap chair.  We cleaned it up and used it for a couple decades.  It is huge, well seasoned, and not something I will ise much anymore.  I still have my small skillet, and the medium sized one from Mom's house.  I shed a few tears over this, the pan made so many meals for use, so many good memories.  It is in the hands of people who knew and loved Larry, so I know it will still serve that purpose. 

Two successes leads to ...???

I made pumpkin spice muffins this morning.  That old mix which had been in the pantry for so long finally is mixed, baked, and in my tummy.  I added a little butternut extract, and kicked up the spices, plus made a crumble topping.  Most of the topping is on the kitchen rug in front of the sink, but that's okay. 

I also made my granola last night.  I put the dry ingredients in the bowl throughout the day, set the fruit aside, and last, got the liquids ready.  Just a matter of mix and bake from there. 

Two successful things accomplished in the kitchen.  I am hoping it will jumpstart me into a few more.  That's how I tick; getting a little done can boost my motivation into an upward trend.  This week it is very uphill, Larry's birthday wrecked me.  I have been crying a lot this morning.  Not that I am surprised, I do cry a lot.

In the midst of all this angst, I am happy for a long time online friend who just got married.  It is wonderful and joyous, and I am glad of the good fortune of others.  Nice to know I am not totally devoid of feeling.

I would have baked a cake ...

As we drove back to Ogden yesterday, Krista offered to stop at Smith's so I could buy a cake to mark Larry's birthday.  I declined, saying I could bake a cake, that I simply wanted to get home. She has a sick puppers, so I wanted her to get back in plenty of time for the vet appointment. 

I went down into the pantry, no cake mixes.  I had a pumpkin spice muffin mix, and a snickerdoodles cookie mix.  They're both at least a year old, because they were down there when Larry passed.  I know I had cake mixes, did I give them away?  I have Jiffy Mix, which makes terrible cakes, and a new pouch of Lilikoi pancake mix I just brought home.  I also have all the ingredients for cake from scratch, although I suspect the flour is aging more than a bit. 

I made a cup of tea and ate a couple stale Korean ginger cookies.  The last of the packet went into the trash. 

Such is the minutia which saps my will.  A slice of cake by myself is nothing, yet everything.  

Aloha and Happy Birthday.

Okay, I have been home from Kona since Friday, but just now am getting to this blog.

It was a good trip; Matt came along.  He's Larry's work-son and good friend.  We rented a car through Turo, and looked like locals.  Nice.  I sprang for a zip-line tour and the night manta-ray snorkeling for him, but just went on the boat as a ride along.  We had a good time, even with the sadness of the chartered boat to send Larry to the Court of King Neptune.  I will do a detailed story on that later.  Honest.  Ate too much, spent too much.  It was good though.  Loki had a good time too.  Matt wants to go back with his kids.

I used wheelchair service through the airports.  Just cannot walk the walk anymore.

This weekend Ford and Krista came to unpack the trailer and button up the swamp cooler; Matt and the kids stopped by and helped out too.  A lot got done.  Matt got the trailer backed up in a flash, but hey, he;s a trucker, that's his thing.  The lean-to needs to be re-arranged, no surprise.  I may try to get my Halloween stuff out this week.  The new yard guy vacuumed up most of the old leaf crap from last year.  Yard looks nice.  I feel so much better.

Desi and I went for massages yesterday, so relaxing.  I really enjoy being able to do that.

Krista took me to Iconoclad today; they accepted most of what I brought.  I added a few things to their free box.  The we went to lunch at Noodles and Co. which was tasty and pleasant.  We had both worn dresses by chance, mine with embroidered golden birds, hers with swans and lotus blossoms.  We looked fabulous.  Today would have been MyLarry's 60th birthday.  I was glad of the distraction.

It's a drag, man

I've always been a bit of a procrastinator.  There's no time like the present though, and if I try, I can be very, very organized.  I stay right on top of bills and such.  However, grief had stomped on my motivations, and it is easy to let some things slide.  I finally went to register the trailer, on the last day possible.  Good thing, I found out from the county clerk a little detail, a letter which will save me thousands on taxes in the long run. I got the carpet spot cleaner, but the carpet is still a disaster.  I need to find someone to clear the back gutters. The leather languishes.  I owe Graidog a tool pouch.  Forever and ever, there are always tasks, and I don't want to do them.

Went to Pig and a Jelly jar, the Raven Queen was there.  I brought her a lace feather embellishment, she bought me breakfast.  The beignets are yummy, but they're more like fritters than the real thing.

I finally found someone to take the cut and stacked firewood.  They're using it for heat in a cabin, they live mostly off grid.  Nice.  Larry wood be pleased. See what I did there?

Been chipping away at the Burning Man stuff, and housework.  Progress is slow, but I am making dents. I sketched an outline for a painting.  I REALLY need to pack for Kona, to print out the papers I need, to get Larry's ashes ready. Prep the house, the cats, and make sure Desi can take Harry to the vet for boarding.  Time for the winter clothing and bedding swap, that will wait until I come back.  I want to lock up my trike, which means a little more shifting burner gear.  Raven Queen will come help me when I return.  Looks like I will be bringing mac nuts as gifts!  Desi wants a barrette, my neighbor loves inlaid silver earrings, and I can easily do both at either the farmer's market or an ABC shop.  Freaking ABC...